Avast! ARRRR!!!

Look alive, ye sons of a biscuit eater! Hoist the mizzenmast and brail that foremast, or the buffer will have ye and Jack o’ Coins will give you naught by a farthing! I knew ye scurvy dogs were cracking Jenny’s tea cup and were loaded to the gunwales, but I need you matelots to look lively! The wind is at our backs and the sea before, I’m finally rid of that bachelor’s wife, and not until I ply the sweet trade routes of the Shetland Isles will we furl sheet. Bring me that horizon, or I’ll see you in Davey Jone’s Locker!!

PS Today is Talk Like A Pirate Day!

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