Hi all. You might be wondering where I’ve been. Well, I’ve been getting ready for the greatest LARP ever made, EVER. Nevertheless, I found some things to wet your whistle:

1) Here are some pretty cool pipes, if you’re into that thing. I’d like to be into it, but my grandfather developed these weird cysts in his mouth because of years of pipe smoking, and it kind of grosses me out whenever I think about it.

2) So, I thought this was cute. Micro$oft (notice the h@x0r $ for S in Microsoft. That’s how you know I’m the real deal) bought a Romanian anti-virus company named GeCAD software – they produce RAV AntiVirus. This was a bit puzzling to some, who wondered if M$ was trying to break into the anti-virus market. Come to find out, RAV AntiVirus stated that “Linux is the primary focus of RAV AntiVirus” (this from RAE Internet, which used to be the exclusive U.S. distributor) and it’s one of the more popular Linux downloads for AntiVirus. How long until Microsoft tries to hurt Linux by not supporting RAV for Linux any more? Turns out, not very long at all.

3) Senator Orrin Hatch wants to destroy your computer if you’re violating any copyright laws. Someone finally pointed out to our poor misguided Luddite that it doesn’t really work that way, and maybe he should just go ahead and crawl back under whatever rock he receives kickbacks from. Let’s call this rock “the RIAA”

4) It looks like they forced Christie Todd Whitman (of NJ fame) into retirement, which is no surprise. What IS a surprise is this report that the White House purposely censored parts of the the environmental report to be more…let’s say “happy”…about the shitty environmental choices that this current administration has made. What’s NOT a surprise is that according to this poll,no one really gives a shit (until white Americans start getting killed that is. Did that sound bitter?).

5) Here’s a tip. You’re a cop. This isn’t fucking Cagney and Lacey. It’s not a Beastie Boys video. If someone is fleeing a crime scene on a bike at 100+ MPH, don’t chase him; get the license number and track him down safely so he’s not a threat to himself or other people. If you DO decide to chase him until his death, please be ready for the consequences. Don’t say things like “the violence was unbelievable. We’re basically a predominantly black community. Many of our police officers are white, but I seldom have complaints of the racial nature.” Maybe it’s tough to complain after someone smashes out your teeth with a nightstick (Did that sound bitter, too?).

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